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Sexual Health & Wellness
Question #24366
60 days ago
103

how to increase my sex time - #24366

Siddharth

I am really worried about my performance in bed. It feels like I always end up finishing way too quickly and I can't help but think my partner deserves more than that. The other night, we were trying a new position, I was really into it but then bam! Less than 5 minutes in, I just couldn’t hold on anymore. I do notice sometimes I get super excited and there seems to be no control. I’ve been reading up on how to increase my sex time but it all seems so technical. Like do I need to do kegel exercises, or are there specific techniques I should try? One friend mentioned some breathing methods which sounded kinda weird, but maybe there’s something to it? I tried just distracting myself, thinking about baseball or my 8th-grade math exam—totally doesn't work! I just feel this pressure, ya know? I worry my partner is getting bored or frustrated. Feels like I need some real advice on how to increase my sex time, not just vague tips. I just want to enjoy those moments without stressing about it so much. Any thoughts on how to increase my sex time?

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Doctors' responses

To address concerns about premature ejaculation and improving endurance, there are a few helpful strategies you might consider. First, it’s beneficial to explore techniques that increase awareness and control over your physical response. Kegel exercises, which strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, can be particularly useful. To do them, contract the muscles you use to stop urinating, hold for 3 seconds, then relax for 3 seconds. Aim for 10 reps, three times a day. Over time, they can help improve control during sex. Another method is the stop-start technique — this involves pausing stimulation just before ejaculation, waiting for a few moments, and then resuming once control has returned. Some men find success by trying different positions that slow the pace and focusing more on mutual enjoyment rather than completion. Also, breathing exercises and practicing mindfulness techniques can help in managing arousal levels. Try taking slow, deep breaths to maintain relaxation — inhale deeply through your nose, hold for a moment, then exhale slowly. In some cases, topical anesthetic creams or sprays may be recommended to reduce sensation. If these strategies don’t seem effective, it might be wise to consult with a healthcare provider. They could consider other factors at play or explore medical treatment options. It’s important to recognize that concerns about performance are common and addressing them proactively is a positive step. Reducing anxiety around performance and improving communication with your partner about these issues can also enhance the experience for both parties.

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