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Struggling with Sexual Performance After Marriage
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Sexual Health & Wellness
Question #29036
21 days ago
82

Struggling with Sexual Performance After Marriage - #29036

Client_8a604a

Thik se kheda nhi hota shadi abhi huvi he pele sab thik ab nhi he kya karu sir me normal porn dek leta phir bhi kheda nhi hota sex karta luse reheta he

How long have you been experiencing these issues?:

- 1-3 months

Have you noticed any specific triggers for your performance issues?:

- No specific triggers

How is your overall health and lifestyle?:

- Moderately healthy, some exercise
300 INR (~3.53 USD)
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Doctors' responses

Dr. Nikhil Chauhan
I am currently working as a urologist and kidney transplant surgeon at Graphic Era Medical College & Hospital, Dehradun. It's a role that keeps me on my toes, honestly. I handle a pretty wide range of urology cases—stones, prostate issues, urinary tract obstructions, infections, you name it. Some are straightforward, others way more complex than you expect at first glance. Every patient walks in with a different story and that’s what keeps the work real for me. Kidney transplant surgery, though, that’s a whole different zone. You’re not just working on anatomy—you’re dealing with timelines, matching, medications, family dynamics, emotional pressure... and yeah, very precise coordination. I’m part of a team that manages the entire transplant process—from evaluation to surgery to post-op care. Not gonna lie, it’s intense. But seeing someone who’s been on dialysis for years finally get a new shot at life—there’s nothing really like that feeling. In the OR, I’m detail-focused. Outside of it, I try to stay accessible—patients don’t always need answers right away, sometimes they just need to feel heard. I believe in walking them through what’s going on rather than just giving reports and instructions. Especially in transplant cases, trust matters. And clear, honest conversation helps build that. Urology itself is such a misunderstood field sometimes. People ignore symptoms for years because it feels “awkward” or they think it’s not serious until it becomes unmanageable. I’ve had patients who came in late just because they were embarassed to talk about urine flow or testicular pain. That’s why I also try to make the space judgment-free—like whatever it is, we’ll figure it out. At the end of the day, whether I’m scrubbing in for surgery or doing OPD rounds, I just want to make sure what I do *actually* helps. That the effort’s not wasted. And yeah, some days are frustrating—some procedures don’t go clean, some recoveries take longer than they should—but I keep showing up, cause the work’s worth doing. Always is.
21 days ago
5

Hi 👋

Aapka issue samajh aa raha hai — new marriage me aisa hona kaafi common hai. Don’t panic.

Possible reasons:

* Performance anxiety (nervousness, pressure to perform) * Overthinking during sex * Porn use se real stimulation kam lagna * Stress / fatigue * Early psychological erectile dysfunction

Kya karein (simple steps):

* Porn completely band karein đŸš« * Foreplay pe focus karein, jaldi penetration ki tension na lein * Partner se open baat karein (no pressure mindset) * Proper sleep + regular exercise đŸƒâ€â™‚ïž * Alcohol/smoking avoid karein * 2–3 weeks “no pressure sex” try karein (sirf intimacy build karein)

Kab doctor dikhaayein:

* Agar 1–2 mahine me improvement na ho * Morning erection bhi weak ho * Diabetes / BP / thyroid ka doubt ho

👉 Yeh mostly temporary aur treatable hota hai — tension lene se aur worse hota hai.

— Dr Nikhil Chauhan, Urologist

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Dr. Shayeque Reza
I completed my medical degree in 2023, but honestly, my journey in healthcare started way before that. Since 2018, I’ve been actively involved in clinical practice—getting hands-on exposure across multiple departments like ENT, pediatrics, dermatology, ophthalmology, medicine, and emergency care. One of the most intense and defining phases of my training was working at a District Government Hospital for a full year during the COVID pandemic. It was chaotic, unpredictable, and exhausting—but it also grounded me in real-world medicine like no textbook ever could. Over time, I’ve worked in both OPD and IPD setups, handling everything from mild viral fevers to more stubborn, long-term conditions. These day-to-day experiences really built my base and taught me how to stay calm when things get hectic—and how to adjust fast when plans don’t go as expected. What I’ve learned most is that care isn't only about writing the right medicine. It’s about being fully there, listening properly, and making sure the person feels seen—not just treated. Alongside clinical work, I’ve also been exposed to preventive health, health education, and community outreach. These areas really matter to me because I believe real impact begins outside the hospital, with awareness and early intervention. My approach is always centered around clarity, empathy, and clinical logic—I like to make sure every patient knows exactly what’s going on and why we’re doing what we’re doing. I’ve always felt a pull towards general medicine and internal care, and honestly, I’m still learning every single day—each patient brings a new lesson. Medicine never really sits still, it keeps shifting, and I try to shift with it. Not just in terms of what I know, but also in how I listen and respond. For me, it’s always been about giving real care. Genuine, respectful, and the kind that actually helps a person heal—inside and out.
21 days ago
5

Ok I can understand your problem. Iske liye apko counselling karna hoga. Treatment se phle problem ko jaan na zruri hai .

1896 answered questions
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Difficulty with maintaining an erection or experiencing erectile dysfunction (ED) can be influenced by numerous factors, both physical and psychological. Since this issue has surfaced post marriage, it’s important to consider if there are changes in lifestyle, stress, or relationship dynamics that might be affecting your sexual performance. One’s mental state can play a significant role here. If the issue of stress or anxiety is a factor, exploring stress management techniques could be very beneficial. On the physical side, conditions like high blood pressure, diabetes, obesity, and certain medications can contribute to ED. Regular exercise and a balanced diet can help improve overall vascular health, which is crucial for erections. If these lifestyle adjustments don’t help or if the problem persists, consulting a healthcare professional is strongly recommended. Medical evaluation might include checking your hormonal profiles like testosterone levels, or cardiovascular health, and making sure there’s no underlying health condition contributing to the problem. Psychological factors like anxiety or depression (and even over-reliance on pornography) can affect erectile function, so addressing these with mental health support could also be advantageous. Prescription medications, such as PDE5 inhibitors (like sildenafil), could be considered, but only after discussing with a healthcare provider who can evaluate your individual health status and risks. Remember, self-medication without guidance can be harmful. Getting a comprehensive evaluation can lead to a more targeted and effective treatment approach.

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Dr. Arsha K Isac
I am a general dentist with 3+ years of working in real-world setups, and lemme say—every single patient teaches me something diff. It’s not just teeth honestly, it’s people
 and how they feel walking into the chair. I try really hard to not make it just a “procedure thing.” I explain stuff in plain words—no confusing dental jargon, just straight talk—coz I feel like when ppl *get* what's going on, they feel safer n that makes all the difference. Worked with all ages—like, little kids who need that gentle nudge about brushing, to older folks who come in with long histories and sometimes just need someone to really sit n listen. It’s weirdly rewarding to see someone walk out lighter, not just 'coz their toothache's gone but coz they felt seen during the whole thing. A lot of ppl come in scared or just unsure, and I honestly take that seriously. I keep the vibe calm. Try to read their mood, don’t rush. I always tell myself—every smile’s got a story, even the broken ones. My thing is: comfort first, then precision. I want the outcome to last, not just look good for a week. Not tryna claim perfection or magic solutions—just consistent, clear, hands-on care where patients feel heard. I think dentistry should *fit* the person, not push them into a box. That's kinda been my philosophy from day one. And yeah, maybe sometimes I overexplain or spend a bit too long checking alignment again but hey, if it means someone eats pain-free or finally smiles wide in pics again? Worth it. Every time.
21 days ago
5

Hello

This situation is actually quite common in the first few months after marriage, and in most cases it is treatable and temporary.

What he is describing sounds like Erectile Dysfunction, where the penis does not become fully hard or loses erection during sex. The important clue here is that earlier everything was normal, and the problem started recently after marriage. That usually points to psychological or situational causes rather than a permanent physical problem.

Stress, performance anxiety, fear of disappointing the partner, overthinking during sex, fatigue, poor sleep, and frequent pornography use can all reduce erection quality even in otherwise healthy men. Many newly married men experience this because expectations are high and anxiety increases. The fact that erection is not strong even after watching porn suggests the mind is under pressure or the body is tired, but it still does not automatically mean a serious disease.

If this has been happening for about 1–3 months, the first step is to focus on lifestyle and mental factors. Adequate sleep, regular exercise, reducing stress, limiting pornography, and not forcing intercourse every time can help the body recover normal response. Spending time on intimacy without pressure for penetration often improves confidence and erections naturally.

Medical causes are less likely at this age if he is otherwise healthy, but they can include diabetes, thyroid problems, low testosterone, obesity, smoking, alcohol use, or certain medications. If the issue continues beyond about 3 months, or erections are weak even during masturbation or in the morning, then a basic medical checkup is reasonable.

Treatment is very effective in most cases. Doctors may suggest counseling, lifestyle changes, or medications such as Sildenafil if needed, but many men improve without long-term medication once anxiety decreases.

In short, this is usually reversible, especially since the problem started recently after marriage. The key signs to seek medical evaluation sooner are complete inability to get an erection, loss of morning erections, presence of diabetes or other chronic illness, or the problem lasting more than about three months despite trying lifestyle adjustments.

Take care

1501 answered questions
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Dr. Bharat Joshi
I’m a periodontist and academician with a strong clinical and teaching background. Over the last 4 years and 8 months, I’ve been actively involved in dental education, guiding students at multiple levels including dental hygienist, BDS, and MDS programs. Currently, I serve as a Reader at MMCDSR in Ambala, Haryana—a role that allows me to merge my academic passion with hands-on experience. Clinically, I’ve been practicing dentistry for the past 12 years. From routine procedures like scaling and root planing to more advanced cases involving grafts, biopsies, and implant surgeries. Honestly, I still find joy in doing a simple RCT when it’s needed. It’s not just about the procedure but making sure the patient feels comfortable and safe. Academically, I have 26 research publications to my credit. I’m on the editorial boards of the Archives of Dental Research and Journal of Dental Research and Oral Health, and I’ve spent a lot of time reviewing manuscripts—from case reports to meta-analyses and even book reviews. I was honored to receive the “Best Editor” award by Innovative Publications, and Athena Publications recognized me as an “excellent reviewer,” which honestly came as a bit of a surprise! In 2025, I had the opportunity to present a guest lecture in Italy on traumatic oral lesions. Sharing my work and learning from peers globally has been incredibly fulfilling. Outside academics and clinics, I’ve also worked in the pharmaceutical sector as a Drug Safety Associate for about 3 years, focusing on pharmacovigilance. That role really sharpened my attention to detail and deepened my understanding of drug interactions and adverse effects. My goal is to keep learning, and give every patient and student my absolute best.
21 days ago
5

Hello ji Aapki problem se lag raha hai ya to erectile dysfunction hai stress ke wajah se ya nutritional deficiencies hai Aapki kuch precautions likh raha hun isko follow karna Agar 1-2 mahinon main fark na para to gynaecologist ko dikhana Hopefully aap jaldi theek ho Avoid heavy meals and alcohol Take ashwagandha or triphala once a day for 2 months Do meditation Do physical exercises atleast for half an hour Especially kegel exercises Take shilajeet for 1 month once a day Regards

2435 answered questions
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Dr. Prasannajeet Singh Shekhawat
I am a 2023 batch passout and working as a general physician right now, based in Hanumangarh, Rajasthan. Still kinda new in the bigger picture maybe, but honestly—every single day in this line teaches you more than textbooks ever could. I’ve had the chance to work under some pretty respected doctors during and after my graduation, not just for the clinical part but also to see how they handle people, real people, in pain, in panic, and sometimes just confused about their own health. General medicine covers a lot, right? Like from the smallest complaints to those random, vague symptoms that no one really understands at first—those are kinda my zone now. I don’t really rush to label things, I try to spend time actually listening. Feels weird to say it but ya, I do take that part seriously. Some patients just need someone to hear the whole story instead of jumping to prescription pads after 30 seconds. Right now, my practice includes everything from managing common infections, blood pressure issues, sugar problems to more layered cases where symptoms overlap and you gotta just... piece things together. It's not glamorous all the time, but it's real. I’ve handled a bunch of seasonal disease waves too, like dengue surges and viral fevers that hit rural belts hard—Hanumangarh doesn’t get much spotlight but there’s plenty happening out here. Also, I do rely on basics—thorough history, solid clinical exam and yeah when needed, investigations. But not over-prescribing things just cz they’re there. One thing I picked up from the senior consultants I worked with—they used to say “don’t chase labs, chase the patient’s story”... stuck with me till now. Anyway, still learning every single day tbh. But I like that. Keeps me grounded and kind of obsessed with trying to get better.
21 days ago
5

Hello Samajh sakta hoon, yeh sab naya hai aur kabhi kabhi pressure ya anxiety ki wajah se aise issues ho sakte hain. Koi baat nahi, yeh aam hai aur bahut logon ko aise samasyaon ka samna karna padta hai.

Kya kar sakte hain:

1. Relaxation Techniques: Stress aur anxiety ko kam karne ke liye deep breathing ya meditation try karein. Yeh aapko relax karne mein madad karega.

2. Communication: Apne partner se khul kar baat karein. Aksar, ek dusre se baat karne se pressure kam hota hai aur aap dono ko samajhne mein madad milti hai.

3. Foreplay: Sex se pehle zyada foreplay par focus karein. Yeh aapko aur aapke partner ko arousal mein madad karega.

4. Consult a Doctor: Agar yeh samasya lagataar ho rahi hai, toh kisi healthcare professional se baat karna achha rahega. Woh aapko behtar samadhan de sakte hain.

5. Avoid Comparisons: Porn dekhne se aapko unrealistic expectations ho sakti hain. Har kisi ka experience alag hota hai, isliye apne aap ko dusron se compare na karein.

Thank you

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Dr. Alan Reji
I'm Dr. Alan Reji, a general dentist with a deep-rooted passion for helping people achieve lasting oral health while making dental visits feel less intimidating. I graduated from Pushpagiri College of Dental Sciences (batch of 2018), and ever since, I've been committed to offering high-quality care that balances both advanced clinical knowledge and genuine compassion for my patients. Starting Dent To Smile here in Palakkad wasn’t just about opening a clinic—it was really about creating a space where people feel relaxed the moment they walk in. Dental care can feel cold or overly clinical, and I’ve always wanted to change that. So I focused on making it warm, easygoing, and centered completely around you. I mix new-age tech with some good old-fashioned values—really listening, explaining stuff without jargon, and making sure you feel involved, not just treated. From regular cleanings to fillings or even cosmetic work, I try my best to keep things smooth and stress-free. No hidden steps. No last-minute surprises. I have a strong interest in patient education and preventive dentistry. I genuinely believe most dental issues can be caught early—or even avoided—when patients are given the right information at the right time. That’s why I take time to talk, not just treat. Helping people understand why something’s happening is as important to me as treating what’s happening. At my practice, I’ve made it a point to stay current with the latest innovations—digital diagnostics, minimally invasive techniques, and smart scheduling that respects people’s time. I also try to make my services accessible and affordable, because good dental care shouldn’t be out of reach for anyone.
21 days ago
5

Aap jo describe kar rahe ho wo Erectile dysfunction ho sakta hai, aur nayi shaadi ke baad yeh aksar performance anxiety ya stress ki wajah se hota hai—especially agar pehle sab normal tha.

Filhaal porn avoid karein, partner ke saath relaxation aur foreplay par focus karein, aur pressure kam karein—zyada sochna problem ko aur badhata hai.

Agar 2–4 weeks me improvement nahi hota, to ek urologist/sexologist se consult karein; zarurat padne par medicines jaise Sildenafil safely prescribe ki ja sakti hain.

1025 answered questions
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