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What to do if I'm feeling hopeless and struggling with health issues after losing my father to suicide?
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Mental & Emotional Health
Question #30870
22 days ago
234

What to do if I'm feeling hopeless and struggling with health issues after losing my father to suicide?

Pawan

Im fatherless from age 15. My father died by selfish suicide without any future guidance. Im 29 now. No one guided me ever. I m sick now. Can you guide me what you learnt from your father. I think I'll die soon. I took metformin without prescription. On bed from months. No improvement only worsening. 500-1500mg doses. Normal standard tests Can you tell why would he do that to us. He even didn't left any financial guidance or money for us.

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Doctors' responses

Hello I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling this way. It’s important to talk to someone who can help you, like a mental health professional or a trusted person in your life. You deserve support and care. Please reach out to someone who can provide the help you need.

Thank you

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It’s crucial to address the most immediate concern, which is your health and your sense of hopelessness. Feeling unwell physically and emotionally after such a significant loss is understandable, but let’s focus on practical steps that can help. Taking metformin without a prescription can be harmful, particularly if it’s not indicated for your specific condition. Metformin is often used for managing type 2 diabetes or to help with insulin resistance. If your tests are standard, continuing metformin without a doctor’s supervision might worsen your situation or mask underlying issues. First, I urge you to stop the medication and consult a healthcare professional for an accurate assessment of your health.

It’s necessary to have a complete check-up to understand why you’re unwell. Persistent symptoms, especially when they can’t be attributed to a particular cause from standard tests, may need a more specialized approach. Consider discussing any potential issues like nutrient deficiencies, thyroid problems, or mental health conditions like depression or anxiety that could be contributing to your symptoms. Engage in finding a primary care provider who can take a comprehensive look at your physical and mental health together, as they often intersect significantly.

The emotional pain from losing your father in the way you did might still be affecting you deeply. If you’re feeling hopeless, talking to a mental health professional such as a counselor or psychologist could be incredibly beneficial. This doesn’t only address grief but also helps with any potential mental health issues that coincide with your current physical health problems. Taking this action can make a substantial difference and provides direction for healing, both emotionally and physically. Prioritize these steps to potentially improve your well-being and future outlook. Avoid making medical decisions without appropriate guidance to ensure safety and proper care for your health needs.

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Don’t worry. Few counselling sessions will make you stronger. You can opt personal consultation.

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Hello Pawan, First of all, I am very sorry that you have had to carry this burden for so many years. Losing your father to suicide at the age of 15 is a deeply painful experience, and it is understandable that you still have unanswered questions. The truth is, no one can know exactly why your father made that decision. In many cases, people who die by suicide are suffering from severe depression, another mental illness, overwhelming stress, or emotional pain that affects their ability to think clearly. It does not necessarily mean he did not love you or your family. Unfortunately, many people who are suicidal are unable to see the impact their death will have on those they leave behind.

Regarding your own health: You mentioned that you have been bedridden for months, feel that you are getting worse, and have been taking metformin (500–1500 mg) without a prescription. If you do not have diabetes or prediabetes diagnosed by a doctor, you should stop taking metformin unless it has been prescribed, as it is unlikely to help and may cause side effects.

Even if your routine blood tests are normal, being confined to bed for months is not normal and needs a thorough medical evaluation. Physical illness, depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, vitamin deficiencies, hormonal problems, and neurological conditions can all cause severe fatigue and weakness. I am also concerned because you said, “I think I’ll die soon.” Sometimes people say this because they feel very unwell physically, and sometimes it reflects emotional distress. Can I ask you something important?

Are you having thoughts of harming yourself or feeling that life is not worth living right now?

If the answer is yes, or if you feel you might act on those thoughts, please tell a trusted family member or friend immediately and go to the nearest emergency department or contact your local mental health crisis service today. You do not have to face this alone, and help is available.

Prescription/Advice: • Stop taking metformin unless it has been prescribed by your doctor. • Arrange an appointment with a physician (preferably an Internal Medicine specialist) for a comprehensive evaluation of your prolonged illness. • Also consult a psychiatrist or clinical psychologist, as prolonged grief and depression are treatable conditions. • Maintain adequate hydration, regular meals, and try to get out of bed for short periods if physically able. • If you develop worsening weakness, chest pain, difficulty breathing, or have thoughts of harming yourself, seek emergency medical care immediately.

Pawan, your father’s decision does not define your future. Even though you have lived without the guidance you deserved, it does not mean things cannot improve from here. There are effective treatments for both physical and emotional illnesses, and you deserve to receive that care.

Feel free to reach out again.

Regards, Dr. Nirav Jain Family Medicine Specialist

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Hello

I am sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, no one can say with certainty why your father died by suicide; in many cases it is related to severe depression or other mental illness rather than a lack of love for the family. Regarding your health, please stop taking metformin without a doctor’s prescription and arrange an in-person medical evaluation, as being bedridden for months despite normal routine tests requires further assessment. If you are feeling hopeless or having thoughts that life is not worth living, please seek urgent help from a mental health professional or your nearest emergency department. You do not have to face this alone.

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Hello dear See you are a young male and the tragedy that happened in your house can create havoc in any body’s mind. It is not abnormalities but there is a previous saying that excess of anything is bad so don’t think of negativity. Iam suggesting some methods for improvement Please follow them for atleast two months Do physical exercise atleast half an hour daily for 5 months Do meditation Take good balanced diet for good health Engage in social media Indulge in hobbies like reading and writing Avoid overthinking Avoid junk food and alcohol/ smoking Set your goals for every day Hopefully improvement will occur In case of no improvement in 2 month consult psychiatrist in person for better clarity Regards

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