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What to do if I'm nervous and can't get an erection for sex after marriage?
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Sexual Health & Wellness
Question #29716
45 days ago
131

What to do if I'm nervous and can't get an erection for sex after marriage? - #29716

Client_9d5147

मैं 32 साल का हु मैने आज तक किसी लड़की के साथ सेक्स नहीं किया है, हालांकि हैंडसेक्स काफी बार किया है, अभी मेरा शादी हुआ है तो मुझे घबराहट के कारण है कि क्या तो सेक्स करने के लिए उसके पास जाने से भी खड़ा नहीं हो रहा है

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Doctors' responses

Dr. Bharat Joshi
I’m a periodontist and academician with a strong clinical and teaching background. Over the last 4 years and 8 months, I’ve been actively involved in dental education, guiding students at multiple levels including dental hygienist, BDS, and MDS programs. Currently, I serve as a Reader at MMCDSR in Ambala, Haryana—a role that allows me to merge my academic passion with hands-on experience. Clinically, I’ve been practicing dentistry for the past 12 years. From routine procedures like scaling and root planing to more advanced cases involving grafts, biopsies, and implant surgeries. Honestly, I still find joy in doing a simple RCT when it’s needed. It’s not just about the procedure but making sure the patient feels comfortable and safe. Academically, I have 26 research publications to my credit. I’m on the editorial boards of the Archives of Dental Research and Journal of Dental Research and Oral Health, and I’ve spent a lot of time reviewing manuscripts—from case reports to meta-analyses and even book reviews. I was honored to receive the “Best Editor” award by Innovative Publications, and Athena Publications recognized me as an “excellent reviewer,” which honestly came as a bit of a surprise! In 2025, I had the opportunity to present a guest lecture in Italy on traumatic oral lesions. Sharing my work and learning from peers globally has been incredibly fulfilling. Outside academics and clinics, I’ve also worked in the pharmaceutical sector as a Drug Safety Associate for about 3 years, focusing on pharmacovigilance. That role really sharpened my attention to detail and deepened my understanding of drug interactions and adverse effects. My goal is to keep learning, and give every patient and student my absolute best.
44 days ago
5

Hello ji Aap ghabrao nahin Starting main aisa hi hota hai Kuch precautions likh raha hun Definitely improvement hogii See following medications can be taken in case if preventive therapy is not successful Avoid heavy meals and alcohol Take ashwagandha or triphala once a day for 2 months Do meditation Do physical exercises atleast for half an hour Especially kegel exercises Take shilajeet for 1 month once a day In case of no improvement in 1 month, kindly consult gynaecologist for further clarification Hopefully aap jaldi theek hon Regards

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Dr. Arsha K Isac
I am a general dentist with 3+ years of working in real-world setups, and lemme say—every single patient teaches me something diff. It’s not just teeth honestly, it’s people… and how they feel walking into the chair. I try really hard to not make it just a “procedure thing.” I explain stuff in plain words—no confusing dental jargon, just straight talk—coz I feel like when ppl *get* what's going on, they feel safer n that makes all the difference. Worked with all ages—like, little kids who need that gentle nudge about brushing, to older folks who come in with long histories and sometimes just need someone to really sit n listen. It’s weirdly rewarding to see someone walk out lighter, not just 'coz their toothache's gone but coz they felt seen during the whole thing. A lot of ppl come in scared or just unsure, and I honestly take that seriously. I keep the vibe calm. Try to read their mood, don’t rush. I always tell myself—every smile’s got a story, even the broken ones. My thing is: comfort first, then precision. I want the outcome to last, not just look good for a week. Not tryna claim perfection or magic solutions—just consistent, clear, hands-on care where patients feel heard. I think dentistry should *fit* the person, not push them into a box. That's kinda been my philosophy from day one. And yeah, maybe sometimes I overexplain or spend a bit too long checking alignment again but hey, if it means someone eats pain-free or finally smiles wide in pics again? Worth it. Every time.
44 days ago
5

Hello sir

Yeh situation bahut common hai, aur jo aap feel kar rahe ho woh bilkul normal hai—especially jab pehli baar sex ho raha ho aur performance ka pressure ho.

Sabse pehle samajh lo ki yeh physical problem nahi hai, yeh anxiety ki wajah se ho raha hai. Jab dimaag me darr ya tension hota hai, toh body naturally erection ko block kar deti hai. Isko performance anxiety bolte hain.

Aapko turant sex perform karne ka pressure lene ki zarurat nahi hai. Shuruaat intimacy se karo—jaise baat karna, hug, kiss, touch—bina penetration ke. Dheere dheere comfort badhega aur body naturally respond karegi.

Apni partner ke saath open rehna bahut important hai, aur aap already woh kar rahe ho—that’s a good sign. Isko ek “test” ya “exam” mat banao, balki ek natural connection ki tarah lo.

Agar erection nahi ho raha ek do baar, usse darne ki zarurat nahi hai. Jitna aap sochoge “hoga ya nahi hoga”, utna hi mushkil hoga. Relax rehna hi main treatment hai.

Agar yeh problem kuch hafton tak continue kare, tab doctor se mil sakte ho—kabhi kabhi mild medication ya counseling help karti hai.

Short me: tension kam karo, slow jao, intimacy pe focus karo—not performance. Sab naturally theek ho jata hai.

Take care

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ये तो आपकी स्थिति आम है और इसे प्रदर्शन चिंता कहा जा सकता है। पहली बार सेक्स के दौरान घबराहट होना बिल्कुल सामान्य है, और इसके कारण इरेक्शन में समस्या हो सकती है। सबसे पहले, ये समझना महत्वपूर्ण है कि ये अनुभव कई लोगों के लिए होता है और इसका समाधान संभव है। चिंता को कम करने के लिए, संभोग की अपेक्षा कम रखें और अपने साथी के साथ खुलकर बात करें। जैसे-जैसे आप एक दूसरे के प्रति सहज होंगे, आपके तनाव के स्तर में कमी आएगी। नियमित व्यायाम और मेडिटेशन आपके मानसिक स्वास्थ्य के लिए भी मददगार हो सकता है, और इसके जरिये आपके आत्मविश्वास में भी सुधार हो सकता है। अगर समस्या बनी रहती है तो, डॉक्टर से परामर्श करें। वे आपके व्यक्तिगत स्वास्थ्य की जाँच करेंगे और जरूरत होने पर एक थैरेपी या दवाओं की सलाह दे सकते हैं। ये सम्भावना भी है कि मूल कारण कोई शारीरिक स्थिति हो, जिसे ध्यान देने की जरूरत है। अपनी लाइफस्टाइल में किसी भी तथ्य को नोट करें जैसे कि अत्याधिक शराब का सेवन, धूम्रपान, या फिर तनावकारी स्थितियां, क्योंकि इनकी वजह से भी इरेक्शन की दिक्कत हो सकती है। नियमित और पर्याप्त नींद भी आपको अपने स्वास्थ्य को बनाए रखने में मदद कर सकती है। कुल मिलाकर, ये सुनिश्चित करना कि आप शारीरिक और मानसिक रूप से ठीक हैं, आपके लिए फायदेमंद होगा।

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