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Sexual Health & Wellness
Question #23360
90 days ago
163

how to do sex more time - #23360

Aayan

I am feeling kinda frustrated about my sex life lately. My partner and I haven’t been as intimate as we used to be, and honestly, I want to know how to do sex more time without it feeling forced or awkward. Like, we both love each other, but sometimes we're just so tired from work or life stuff that we don’t even think about it. Last week we tried to set up a romantic evening and ended up just watching a movie instead – I mean, what’s that about?? I’ve read some articles about how to do sex more time and they suggest scheduling it in our calendars which feels a bit, I dunno, robotic? Is that really the way to go? Should I be looking into supplements or maybe even trying out new techniques or positions? I just want to feel that spark again and be more spontaneous! Also, any thoughts on setting the mood without it feeling like a chore would be super helpful. Have you guys dealt with anything similar? How do you make it fun and natural while figuring out how to do sex more time in a way that feels right for both of you?

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Doctors' responses

It’s completely normal for life and stress to impact frequency and spontaneity in your sex life, but there are definitely ways to rekindle that spark without it feeling forced. The idea of scheduling sex isn’t about making it a chore but rather about prioritizing intimacy amidst busy schedules. Think of it as creating space for connection rather than a rigid appointment. This can actually increase anticipation and excitement. If that idea doesn’t resonate, consider setting aside intentional couple time where intimacy can naturally blossom—whether that’s over dinner, a shared hobby, or even during quiet moments without distraction. Enhancing intimacy can also be influenced by breaking routine. Try exploring different environments, experimenting with new positions, or incorporating sensory elements like music, aroma, or lighting to cultivate a conducive ambiance. Importantly, address the underlying nonsexual intimacy; initiatives like regular communication about feelings, needs, and desires can enhance closeness, making sexual intimacy more organic. Regarding supplements, approach with caution; unless there’s an underlying medical condition, many don’t have substantial evidence supporting their effectiveness. It’s wise to speak with a healthcare provider before adding any supplements to your routine. As for techniques and positions, exploring these as a team can add an element of novelty and fun—make it about mutual discovery. Remember, spontaneity often can’t be forced, but creating opportunities for it can certainly happen. If challenges persist, consider consultating with a therapist specializing in couples or sexual health to explore tailored solutions.

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